Thursday, November 29, 2007

Pet Peeves

Pajiba had another comment diversion recently. I would have posted mine there, but here they would actually be seen.

Cinematic: Overly expository dialogue that repeats the simplest concepts and events. Show, don't tell, okay? Also, any horrendously inaccurate portrayal of physics, computers, technology, or any science for that matter. Just because it is fiction doesn't mean you have carte blanche (sp?) to make up shit as you go along. There are enough bored science majors out there that can help you get your crap straight.

Internet: Being an asshole for no good reason, and being terrible at it. I like snark as much as anyone, but that is only when the snark is actually FUNNY. Retreading over a better joke is pathetic, and even more so when a person can't even retread right. Why do you think I use so many clips from "The Soup"? It's because they say it funnier than I could! Second, people who actually comment on whether or not they would sleep with a celebrity, and the folks that automatically respond with retorts about the commenter's appearance. You both sound like idiots. The former needs to get a reality check and realize nobody cares about their sexual proclivities unless they are in porn, and the latter needs to stop using "I'm rubber, you're glue" type logic in their arguments.

Other: Extremists for anything. Nothing in this world is worth all that damn dedication. Most recently: the War on Christmas bullshit. Christians, get over yourselves. Just because someone doesn't comment you on your desk tree or your stupid Jesus sweater bought on PVC doesn't mean you are being persecuted. Non-Christians, shut the fuck up. It is called Christmas. Some people like celebrating it. Nobody is forcing you to convert, so just cheer the fuck up and enjoy. Or better yet, come up with some anti-Christmas songs that sound have as good as the Temptations version of "Silent Night." You might have something then.

And both sides, lets all remember the REAL reason for the season: the pagan sun god's virility as he prepares to enter his slumber or some such nonsense. Just like Easter really means "parade your underage daughters around like livestock so the skeevy old men in the neighborhood can size them up for future molestation/marriage/rape/domestic slavery."

4 brain pickings:

  1. Um, why do you hate me? I can't help it if shopaholics on a mission freak me out.

  2. I don't hate you. I meant the Debbie Downers who have to constantly complain when someone even acknowledges the damn holiday exists. I don't include the commercialization and materialism as part of Holly, Jolly Christmas, but as its own entity of asinine proportions.

    You can hate the shopoholics all you want. That makes me like you more.

  3. When I toiled there under the minor demons, there was actually a company policy in Corporate Hell regarding no Christmas decorations of any kind in the workspace. Now, the degree to which this was enforced depended on the actual department in which you worked.

    But I do remember this policy taking affect the Christmas after the company decided, in an effort to be more culturally sensitive, to no longer display the large evergreen wreaths adorned with doves on the front of the buildings.

    Apparently, the international symbol of peace (and John Woo's overused visual obsession) is culturally insensitive.

    Who knew?

    Happy Christmas anyway.

  4. Regarding cinematic peeves, what grates, grates, grates on me is the double dialogue in "The Hunt for Red October" when Courtney Vance tells Scott Glenn there's possibly a "boomer coming out of the barn. Could be a missile boat out of Polyjarny".

    That's what "boomer coming out of the barn" means! Use the shorthand in the book or don't, but don't be redundant!!

    Thanks for bringing that up so I could get it out.


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