A Bit Of A Vent

A little background: as most of my readers are aware, I am an occasional contributor to Pajiba, a pop-culture site. Originally the site only did movie reviews, but recently has expanded its coverage to music, books, and other assorted subjects. One of the things I like about the site is how well they treat their commenters: regardless of consensus or even subject matter, they all get a chance at shining. I should know, since I got my gig there by starting as a commenter. So it is reasonable to assume that I may be a bit defensive of the comments section and the nonsense therein.

There is a contingent of site visitors that only come for the reviews, and deign to participate in the less serious posts on the site. They rarely bother to comment positively or negatively, and that is fine by me. Live and let live.

Unfortunately there is one particular commenter, the aptly-self-titled pissant, who has decided to make it his or her personal mission to 'convince' (read: bully and pester) the site runners to only do reviews. This person feels that the non-review posts (especially the more gossip-oriented Pajiba Love) are akin to making the site TMZ2 (which just proves that this person has not actually hung around TMZ for a decent length of time). This in and of itself is not the reason I am venting.

No, the reason I am angry is this:

So many comments for this. If you will, a story:

In college, I lived in a house with three other guys. Friends were constantly over and partying. Naturally, someone had puked in the yard. One day, a strange dog came into the yard while we were sitting on the porch. He proceeded to eat the vomit, hang out for a bit, and then take a shit in our yard.

That is how I view EE. And, no, I'm not trying to get in on it.

I simply have too much to say, and I don't want to disrespect the other commenters or the post writers by taking up their space (and I definitely don't want they to have to deal with my superlong rant in their mailboxes), so I am posting it here. Feel free to do what you will with it, I just really got to do this.

Let me give you a hypothetical scenario.

Say there is this couple. Been together for some time now. They are quite comfortable with each other. Then, one of them begins to change. Now, they still have those lovable qualities, but they seemed to have adapted some new aspects. Now while others find these habits endearing, the person's significant other hates them and constantly demands that their loved one changes back to the person they believe they knew. Now the person changing, they acknowledge that they aren't the same anymore, but they respectfully decline, having gotten used to their new form sand their new popularity.

The significant otehr just cannot comprehend why someone they love so much refuses to do what they say and stay the same way, and they refuse to accept any of the changes. As far as they are concerned, the only person worth loving was the old version. Yet they still stay with this person, convinced that they can make them change back, often insulting their new look or their friends, and considering the person they once loved beneath them. They start to feel like they are doing this relationship a favor by staying around, until their loved one gets it through their thick skull that only their opinion matters.

Now, tell me: does that sound like a healthy relationship?

It doesn't to me. Neither person is happy, and it seems like one's sole duty is to make the other one miserable enough to capitulate. That isn't my definition of a loving relationship.

I get that you are displeased with the site, but you are doing nobody favors with the insults. Really, all you are doing is hardening the site even further against you.

And you are really underestimating how essential the comment section and the resulting posts really are. You claim to appreciate the music and book reviews, but you ignore the fact that, if not for the commenters (and Pajiba's willingness to experiment), those wouldn't even be there. The book reviews came from two popular and (at least for one) beloved commenters. The music reviews are the result of another frequent commenter, and all of them indulged in those silly diversions you so hate. For you to spit in their collective faces is really offensive.

And that is what you are doing: spitting in their faces. Yeah, the site isn't perfect. Yes, the commenters go off on ridiculous tangents and potty humor. But that is how the site is now. It has changed, and it is increasingly likely that it isn't going back. So your little snide remarks and complaining is doing nothing but spreading bad feelings around. I hope that is not your intention. If you really feel that you cannot accept the changes, or adjust to them, then maybe it is time to move on and find a site more to your liking.

Oh, before I forget, I know quite often people like to throw the "freedom of speech" or "if you don't like my comment, don't read it" defense, so just in case:

First off, freedom of speech is from the government. They can't tell you to shut up and go away. But regular citizens, acting in their own behalf, have that ability. I consider it highly ironic that you desire to curtail the very mechanism (the freeform comments section) that allows you to express your opinions.

Second, people can disagree without being disagreeable. My irritation is not because I disagree, but stems from the implicit disdain and demeaning attitude with which you post. You may take it as a personal attack, but seeing as I don't even know you beyond your comments, I wouldn't mean it as such.

Third, and final, the internet is a big place; if you really want to say what you want without people confronting you about it, I suggest you get a blog and shut off the comments.

For everyone else, thank you for indulging me.